Muggers Holdup Cat at Gunpoint

LANHAM, MD: Seymour the cat was held up at gunpoint yesterday while making a withdrawal from an ATM machine.

“First he pulled a gun on me, and then he took a picture of the holdup for some reason. I acted instinctively and hissed at him. He must have gotten scared by my ferocity, because he ran off dropping his camera” Seymour stated.

Police are on the lookout for a white male, purported to be “real big, but a real puss.”

If you have any information regarding the perpetrator, please contact your local police authority.
-xxx